Sunday, December 13, 2009

Aggressive children

Lack of attention and love from adults, birth to a child's aggressiveness. The manifestations of aggression are different: children are fighting with peers, calling them, roughly teachers and parents. They seemed to provoke the surrounding reactive aggression, "boil" for trouble.
Parents brawlers come to despair of fruitless attempts to subdue his Son, and of endless recriminations and clarify relationships with mothers and fathers of child victims. Certainly, this unapologetic child who is a source of endless grief, it is very difficult to accept for what it is, and even more difficult - to understand. The causes of aggressive behavior can be varied, sometimes being an innate quality, a consequence of peculiarities of temperament and nervous system. But much more often - a reflection of improper training or internal discomfort for the baby, which is not taught adequately respond to the events happening around. Often these children feel rejected, feel that parents do not like them. Wanting to be needed and loved, the little man is looking for ways to attract attention to their peers and adults. Unfortunately, these searches often end not so, as we would like, and very little boy, and the people around him. Moreover, often it turns out that the model of aggressive behavior, he takes over from someone from the family. If the family used to always sort things out in a raised voice, and perhaps in rough form, it is not surprising that the child will imitate their parents.



Studies have shown that parents, weighed on the emissions from their children (force force ache), contrary to expectations, not eliminate, but rather to develop excessive aggressiveness, which in later years becomes a part of nature. A child who is forced to constantly suppress their anger, more at risk of psychosomatic disorders such as urticaria, psoriasis, stomach ulcers, migraine headaches, high blood pressure. If you do not pay attention to the aggressive reaction of the child, then very soon it will begin to believe that such behavior is permitted. Then, at first rare and isolated flare-up gradually and imperceptibly turn into a permanent and enduring habit of suppressing others. The negative mood should have a beginning, but in a socially acceptable form. One of the adults in a calm atmosphere, and preferably in the form of a game, the baby must demonstrate appropriate ways to express protest, thus indicating to him the search path expressions.



Try to time emotions, realizing that the child is in full swing on the test of protest, to help him to express feelings, and gradually imposing rules of the game. Let it just loud pokrichit. Deep breathing and a loud sound can take even very strong stress. If the child wants someone to knock, then let him into the hands of carpet beater and send knock pillows. Or, suggest, for example, play obzyvalki.



The only condition - the word should not be offensive and insulting to have meaning in real life. And then in turn miscall each other, your heart's desire: "And you -" carrot "," And you - fly agaric ". In such games, severity of negative emotions, usually goes away, and in general all ends with laughter. At the end of the game always tell each other something pleasant. This game is useful not only for the aggressive, but also to excessively touchy children.



Another way to overcome anger - with the help of paper. How? Simple! Start a "piece of anger. This is an ordinary sheet of paper, large enough, which shows the sort of monster. Boss sheet can wreak on him their negative emotions, crumpling the sheet or tearing it. Often the emotional world of aggressive children is very poor. It is easy to guess that in this case, they simply do not understand either his or others' emotions. For training you can draw a typical mug with different emotions, such as expressing joy, anger, resentment, boredom, sympathy, compassion, anger, etc. Together with your child sign this "guess" emotions under each mug, and then ask him from time to time, so that looking at the paper, he showed what he had in one moment or another state. Of course, these are good tips for moms and dads who have not lost contact with the child, so they can learn by their example how to respond to difficult situations without losing self-control. If the situation got out of control if the child (especially teenagers) refuses to comply with generally accepted rules, especially annoys others, deliberately trying to bring them out himself, blames his mistakes only to others, it requires professional help of a psychologist.
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